Song
His Song:
in memory absorbed
the mind of a wanderer
long seasons kept away
from his unforgotten home
the mind of a wanderer
recalling a departure
long seasons kept away
since bidding her farewell
recalling a departure
under rain’s light notes
since bidding her farewell
its tune become his theme
rainfall’s light notes
from his unforgotten home
its strain becomes his theme
in memory absorbed
Her Reply:
autumn’s lotus gatherers
toiling with their loads
in verdant fields labor
carrying the harvest home
toiling under their loads
another strain is heard
carrying the harvest home
with a hum of work completed
another strain is heard
triumphant voices raised
in a hum of work completed
the joyous victor’s hymn
triumphant voices raised
in verdant fields of labor
the joyous victor’s hymn
of autumn’s lotus gatherers
Original poem:
Translator's Notes:
The poem in Chinese (untitled in the original) was written by two anonymous poets. The first verse was a sort of love note written home by the male poet who had traveled far away and was homesick. The second verse is the reply of the one at home who is waiting for him, echoing the structure of his note to her. The form used is a type of verse built on repetition. Each line is seven characters in length. The last three characters of line 1 become the first three characters in line 2, and the last three characters in line 2 the first three of line 3, etc. The last three words of the final line are the first three of the first line, creating a sort of circle of the words as the verse builds up.
I experimented with many forms, attempting to capture the repetitive, musical tone of the piece, before finally settling on the pantoum. The pantoum is not precisely the same, obviously, as the original structure, even turning the original four lines of each section into four verses. In my experiments, when following the original structure in a more literal way, the piece became monotonous and unwieldy. The pantoum offered a form that repeats words in a musical way, rather than a monotonous one. In this way, it highlights the musicality of the original, both structurally and thematically. It is for this reason that I also chose to title the piece "Song." The pantoum seems to me to echo the way that the piece plays with the words and repetitions, even though it looks rather different on paper.
Shelly Bryant grew up in the US, but has spent her whole adult life in Asia. She currently splits her time between Shanghai and Singapore, sometimes teaching English literature and sometimes learning Chinese language. She loves to read, write, travel, and cycle. Her first poetry collection, Cyborg Chimera, was released in October 2009, and her second, Under the Ash, is due out in late 2010. You can visit her website at http://web.me.com/shellybryant
His Song:
in memory absorbed
the mind of a wanderer
long seasons kept away
from his unforgotten home
the mind of a wanderer
recalling a departure
long seasons kept away
since bidding her farewell
recalling a departure
under rain’s light notes
since bidding her farewell
its tune become his theme
rainfall’s light notes
from his unforgotten home
its strain becomes his theme
in memory absorbed
Her Reply:
autumn’s lotus gatherers
toiling with their loads
in verdant fields labor
carrying the harvest home
toiling under their loads
another strain is heard
carrying the harvest home
with a hum of work completed
another strain is heard
triumphant voices raised
in a hum of work completed
the joyous victor’s hymn
triumphant voices raised
in verdant fields of labor
the joyous victor’s hymn
of autumn’s lotus gatherers
Original poem:
Translator's Notes:
The poem in Chinese (untitled in the original) was written by two anonymous poets. The first verse was a sort of love note written home by the male poet who had traveled far away and was homesick. The second verse is the reply of the one at home who is waiting for him, echoing the structure of his note to her. The form used is a type of verse built on repetition. Each line is seven characters in length. The last three characters of line 1 become the first three characters in line 2, and the last three characters in line 2 the first three of line 3, etc. The last three words of the final line are the first three of the first line, creating a sort of circle of the words as the verse builds up.
I experimented with many forms, attempting to capture the repetitive, musical tone of the piece, before finally settling on the pantoum. The pantoum is not precisely the same, obviously, as the original structure, even turning the original four lines of each section into four verses. In my experiments, when following the original structure in a more literal way, the piece became monotonous and unwieldy. The pantoum offered a form that repeats words in a musical way, rather than a monotonous one. In this way, it highlights the musicality of the original, both structurally and thematically. It is for this reason that I also chose to title the piece "Song." The pantoum seems to me to echo the way that the piece plays with the words and repetitions, even though it looks rather different on paper.
Shelly Bryant grew up in the US, but has spent her whole adult life in Asia. She currently splits her time between Shanghai and Singapore, sometimes teaching English literature and sometimes learning Chinese language. She loves to read, write, travel, and cycle. Her first poetry collection, Cyborg Chimera, was released in October 2009, and her second, Under the Ash, is due out in late 2010. You can visit her website at http://web.me.com/shellybryant
